Is It Really Your Horse… or Is It You?

Let me tell you a story.

I was called to treat a mare. Sweet, kind, soft-eyed — but her body was locked. Her back felt like stone. Her rider said, “She just doesn’t move like she used to.”

We walked her up. We trotted. Nothing obvious. So I asked a different question — not about the horse, but about the rider.

How have you been feeling lately?

That’s when it shifted. She admitted she’d been overwhelmed, disconnected, under pressure.

So instead of adjusting the horse — we adjusted the rider. I coached her breathing. Her posture. Her awareness.

As her nervous system softened, the mare’s body followed. Her back lifted. Her breath deepened. The rider gasped. “I haven’t felt her like this in years.”

It wasn’t magic. It was connection.

And it’s built on four foundational questions:

1. What’s going on with me?

2. What’s going on with my horse?

3. What’s going on between us?

4. What’s going on in the environment?

   
   

Most riders obsess over 2 and 4. But healing and connection usually begin with 1 and 3.

That’s where the limbic echoes live — the old patterns, triggers, emotional signatures we carry into the saddle. When we become aware of them, we can rewire them. Not just in thought, but in real time.

This awareness doesn’t just improve your riding — it transforms your relationship. Because your horse isn’t waiting for a better arena or a softer bit. They’re waiting for you.